1. Faced with the choice of enduring a bad toothache or going to the dentist, we generally tried to ride out the bad tooth.-Joseph Barbera
2. Happiness is your dentist telling you it won’t hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.-Johnny Carson
3. Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.-Ogden Nash
4. Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.-Ambrose Bierce
5. If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist’s office would be full of luminous ideas.-Mason Cooley
6. It was a sweet smile, but it hid menace, like the kind dentists gave.-Andy Paine
7. My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon’s appointments.-Steven Wright
8. I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. He told me to wear a brown tie.-Rodney Dangerfield
9. An aching tooth is better out than in. To lose a rotting member is a gain.-Richard Baxter
10. I wonder if there’s such a thing as a spiritual dentist? I think my whole personality is full of cavities!-Charles M. Schulz
11. Blessed are they who hold lively conversations with the helplessly mute, for they shall be called dentists.-Ann Landers
12. I was never afraid of anything in the world except the dentist.-Taylor Caldwell
13. I won’t have to brush my teeth or floss tonight. Any food trapped in my teeth got knocked out.-Charles Thomas
14. Good dental care doesn’t make you a good student, but if your tooth hurts, it’s hard to be a good student.-Geoffrey Canada
15. When life is kicking others in the teeth, Become a dentist.-Kevin Myers
16. Be true to your teeth and they won’t be false to you.-Soupy Sales
17. A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth.-George D. Prentice
18. If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him.-Martin H. Fischer
19. Brush your teeth everyday, To keep dentist away.-Anonymous
20. A dentist gets to the root of the problem.-Anonymous
21. I was a left-handed dentist who made people cry.-Casey Stengel
22. My dentist is actually a highly technical specialist, constantly experimenting with the latest dental research. The equipment he has makes my old dentist look prehistoric.-Joelle Carter
23. Smile, it lets your teeth breathe.-Anonymous