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Funny Family Quotes

Funny Family Sayings And Quotes
1. Families are like fudge – mostly sweet, with a few nuts.-Les Dawson


2. Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of the family brings the car back.-Earl Wilson


3. A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.-Ogden Nash


4. The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.-Robert Brault


5. Children really can brighten up a house, because they never turn the lights off.-Ralph Bus


6. All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.-W.C. Fields


7. I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance -waiting for the bathroom.-Bob Hope


8. The advantage of having only one child is that you always know who did it.-Erma Bombeck


9. As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.-Buddy Hackett


10. The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.-Sam Levenson


11. Having a child makes you a parent; having two, you are a referee.-David Frost


12. Nothing in life is fun for the whole family. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry.-Jerry Seinfeld


13. The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.-George Carlin


14. One day you will do things for me that you hate. That is what it means to be family.-Jonathan Safran Foer


15. From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we would just stretch, but occasionally one of us would actually get up to go to the fridge.-Jarod Kintz


16. Family is just accident…They don’t mean to get on your nerves. They don’t even mean to be your family, they just are.-Marsha Norman


17. I think the family is the place where the most ridiculous and least respectable things in the world go on.-Ugo Betti


18. If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that members not present and subjects discussed were one and the same.-Robert Brault


19. Family is a blessing. Just keep saying that when you are irritated by something a family member says.-Marcelina Hardy


20. In the family sandwich, the older people and the younger ones can recognize one another as the bread. Those in the middle are, for a time, the meat.-Anna Quidlen


21. In a household of toddlers and pets, we discover this rule of thumb about happy families, that they are least two-thirds incontinent.-Robert Brault


22. Family: A social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space.-Evan Esar


23. I realized my family was funny, because nobody ever wanted to leave our house.-Anthony Anderson


24. If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.-George Bernard Shaw


25. The great advantage of living in a large family is that early lesson of life’s essential unfairness.-Nancy Mitford


26. In some families, please is described as the magic word. In our house, however, it was sorry.-Margaret Laurence


27. If you don’t believe in ghosts, you’ve never been to a family reunion.-Ashleigh Brilliant


28. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.-George Burns


29. Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.-Friedrich Nietzsche


30. Some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts.-Wayne H.

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