Random Quotes

Funny Motivational Quotes

Funny Motivational Quotes
1. Always remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else.-Anonymous

 

2. If you let your head get too big, it’ll break your neck.-Elvis Presley

 

3. Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.-Helen Rowland

 

4. Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.-Charles Schulz

 

5. Opportunity is always knocking. The problem is that most people have the self-doubt station in their heads turned up way too loud to hear it.-Brian Vaszily

 

6. The only time I don’t have any problems in this world is when I am already six feet below the ground.-James Jason

 

7. When you have failed at being nice, you’ve actually succeeded in being mean. Success is everywhere if you know where to look for it.-Katina Ferguson

 

8. Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.-Dale Carnegie

 

10. The process of learning is a nonstop orgy of wonderment.-Lev Grossman

 

11. The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.-Franklin P. Jones

 

12. Aspire to inspire before we expire.-Eugene Bell Jr.

 

13. By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.-Robert Frost

 

14. When you pray be careful of how you respond to what you get. I read somewhere that if you pray for rain. Don’t complain about the mud!-Hyacinth Mottley

 

15. The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.-Will Rogers

 

16. Watching a person who successfully loses fifty pounds and changes her life is more inspirational than listening to a fitness coach with a perfect body.-Martin Meadows

 

17. If laughter is the best medicine, let’s OD together.-Michael P. Clutton

 

18. I enjoy growing older and wiser and learning from my mistakes every single day.-Ellen DeGeneres

 

19. Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.-Kyle Chandler

 

20. Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished – If you’re alive it isn’t.-Richard Bach

 

21. If you’re going through hell, keep going.-Winston Churchill

 

22. Life is like the stock market. Some days you’re up. Some days you’re down. And some days you feel like something the bull left behind.-Paula Wall

 

23. Goal setting is similar to travelling from point A to point B within a city. If you clearly understand what the goal is, you will definitely reach the destination because you know its address.-Thomas Abreu

 

24. I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.-Groucho Marx

 

25. Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.-Winston Churchill

 

26. I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.-Ron White

 

27. If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.-Dalai Lama

 

28. Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.-Mark Twain

 

29. I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.-Lily Tomlin

 

30. The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time.-Joe Girard

 

31. It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.-Robert Benchley

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