Keep our emotions close to our chests can make us seem safer but it’s not the most healthy way to go through life. This hinders us from talking about our concerns (which can become something that is cyclical) and hinders us from connecting with other people. In the long run it is possible to keep emotions in a bottle. This can cause harm in unanticipated ways that affect the physical and mental health of us.
Why We Are Prone To Bottle Our Emotions
There are many situations that we feel the need to keep our emotions in check. For instance, we might simply want to just get through the day, we tell ourselves that we’ll be able to deal with the emotions lateron, and we decide that it’s not worth examining or try to cover up our feelings to create a connection that will “work.”
However, in the end we are prone to keep our emotions in a safe place because of one reasons: it seems easier and more secure to do this.
The reasons why we occasionally or most times, bottle up our emotions vary, but all appear to be rooted in an fear of being vulnerable. In response to this fear, we respond with self-protective measures for emotional security”. says Dr. Colleen Mullen, PsyD, LMFT. “Bottling up your emotions can give you an illusion of security emotionally.”
She suggests that certain individuals learn in their teen years and mature, that sharing their feelings isn’t secure. There are a variety of ways this could play out during childhood.
For someparents, the parent can be dismissive or even minimizing their feelings, whereas for some, the parent can be fearful in their expression of their emotions or is intimidating to them. In some cases, it could be a sign of a child’s early recognition of the parents’ anxiety and fails to react well when a child expresses their concerns or emotions.
“Those children could become the adult who’s emotional stifled,” Dr. Mullen states. “The suppressing, or avoiding of expressions of emotion ends with a feeling of anxiety of having to say “no or ‘no or being considered a negative judge.”
The Reason We Hide Our Feelings Can Often Backfire
While squeezing our emotions may appear to be an ideal plan in the short run however, it could negatively influence us in these ways:
Stresses Our Mental Health
A constant disregard for our own feelings could ultimately affect confidence in ourselves. As time passes, we could believe that no one cares about our desires or needs and that our opinions or voice isn’t important.
It could cause us to feel anxious, depressed, or even anxious. In some instances it is possible to feel extremely angry or rageful, and experience feelings of hatred towards other people.
The Physical Health Of Our Body Is Compromised
“There is evidence to suggest that the act of storing up your emotions could cause the physical strain on your human body.” states Dr. Mullen. “The stress that is caused to the body may cause an increase in diabetes as well as heart disease risk. Other side effects could be memory problems.”
Impacts Our Social Relations
The importance of maintaining healthy social connections is to our overall wellbeing. In the end, we’re social beings at the most fundamental level. If we’re not able convey ourselves in a way that is authentic, our relationships won’t be developed in meaningful ways.
“Human contact with humans can aid in balancing our nervous system , and allow to see things from a different perspective, keeping us from falling into spirals of fear and false assumptions,” says Shari Foos, MA, MFT, MS. “Most importantly If you’re not honest and truthful, how can you ever be acknowledged? If you’re not recognized, how will you possibly be loved as what you really are?”
The Signs You’re Bottled Emotions
Although in certain instances we intentionally suppress our emotions, it’s more common to do this without conscious. A few indicators that you’re not completely communicating your feelings are:
- It’s like people do not “get your point of view.”
- You’re not getting the results you need from time spent with other people.
- It is common to experience somatic symptoms that include an upset stomach, headaches, digestive issues or a racing heart. tension.
- You are experiencing increasing angry as well as frustration at the universe and other people.
- It is normal to feel anger towards others.
If you suspect somebody else may be bottled up their feelings, there are things to be on the lookout for, too.
“Signs to tell if someone’s trying to bottle out emotions can be observed by the choice of words, tone, or body language. Individuals may also fold their body inwards and wiggle their hands. They may also tap their feet or fingers and squint their eyes or even shake their heads” Foos says. Foos.
She continues, “Their response to being given a simple question such as’tell me something about yourself’ could vary from a simple “I don’t know,” or an attempt to alter the subject, end the conversation or taking the conversation off.”
How To Improve Your Skills In Self-expression
The ability to express our emotions doesn’t occur easily. Instead, it requires practice and dedication to honouring our own feelings. As time passes, we will learn to express and process our emotions.
“Dr. Mullen says, “One of the most effective ways to get better in expressing yourself is to say exactly what you want to say.” This sounds easy enough, but it’s going to require time and practice. Begin small and concentrate on positive feelings. Then, as time passes, you’ll develop muscles.
It Could Refer To Saying Phrases Like
- “I felt so loved after you made dinner last night.”
- “I’m hoping you can assist me on Saturday with my project.”
- “I would like to ensure that you know the context from which I’m coming.”
- “I am content when we do these things with each other.”
- After that, you may move on to express dissatisfied or neutral feelings. Some examples might include:
- “Sometimes I feel like you don’t hear me.”
- “I’m extremely sad that you’re not helping with my Saturday needs.”
- “I was sad that you didn’t think about XYZ.”
- “I’m unhappy that I’m forced to bring this issue up yet.”